K Plan

KPlan-The Menopausal Cloud, Sometimes You’re NOT Feeling It

Yawn….

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My doodles of late…

Mornings can be tricky sometimes.  Monday mornings especially can be even trickier when you’ve had it with winter, hormones are wacky, and your neighbors below, were noisy over the weekend which equals crappy sleep.

Grumble grumble!   Yes this was me this past Monday morning.  I’m up by 5am during the week – that rarely changes.  If it’s one thing I’ve learned about myself is I crave ME TIME.  And we are talking, DAILY.  I start to get grouchy and even a bit anxious if I’ve been too busy or not able to ‘take time’ to recharge or just ‘be’.  It could be reading or sitting outdoors, maybe watching something on Netflix, writing,  or randomly surfing the internet.  I just know I am not myself without it!

This past weekend added up to a bunch of little events going on..all ‘ok’ – nothing over the top ‘fun’ – just ok.  But my me time was sporadic and rushed…not to my liking!  Add to that I’ve also been feeling this underlying feeling of restlessness for a few weeks. (I may bring this up in more detail in different post/video)  But back to Monday…let’s just say it was a combination of things and my mood was low.  I at least recognize and acknowledge it these days.  So that’s something.  However what I decide to do or not do about it can be up for grabs.

It was supposed to be my ‘gym’ day – nothing high speed of course, but I knew I had things coming up later this week where I may miss a day or two of exercise and I knew I ‘should’ go.  I had zero motivation to go – AT ALL.  I was quite happy to just sit and veg until I had to leave for work.  I was this close to doing just that.

Sigh – but I didn’t.  I got my act together enough and ended up at the gym.  Did I do a fabulous workout?  Probably not. I did the bare minimum -with no real zest lol.  But I did it.  And that walk back to my car when I finished at least had me feeling a bit better about myself – “I went, even though I feel like crap”.

I’m very aware of my feelings these days -I get ‘wobbly’ on occasion, however I  just don’t accept feeling ‘bad’ for too long.  I now know I really can do something about it.  It takes practice like anything else.  This past Monday was simply another day I could let drag me down or I could find subtle ways to improve my outlook.  I did pretty good, considering.

I knew at least that I would  not let myself wallow too long or get down on myself if I decided not to go to the gym. There was always something I could have done for exercise during the day – it wouldn’t have to have been a total write off.

It’s one day at a time anyway.  So why get my ‘knickers in a twist’ over something temporary?  🙂  I’m not.

Hormones, 6 months of winter, overtired can mess up anyone’s mood – so my recent trifecta was one of discontent, till I decided to fix it.  I’m working on it. ~ Katy

 

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