Well I just thought this made for a nice check in type post because I am 2 months in to my new regime . The photo on the left is me at a family get together on Christmas Eve 2015 and is the only photo of me taken on that day. The photo of me on the right I took, just this weekend.
On the Christmas photo I’m sitting down, I couldn’t hide behind the cardigan I was wearing because the cardigan wouldn’t fasten over the chest, so I stayed hidden behind a table instead! I’m wearing what was my new Christmas dress, bought from ‘Seasalt’ – it is a busy patterned empire line style jersey dress which is both very forgiving and comfortable and at the time of purchase, went some way to disguising my shape – my ‘out of shape’ shape!
On that Christmas Eve, I had already decided that I was going to make some big changes come 2016 and I had already started making those changes – the exercise campaign had kicked in and the changes I proposed to introduce to my eating habits were barely a week a way.
Still at the Christmas photo I was at my heaviest barring pregnancies, and even that was becoming a moot point!
People like ‘before and after shot’s and I can understand why – I like them too. I don’t like it though, when I am the subject matter – taking selfies is actually harder than I thought (I know that sounds pathetic!!) and I always struggle to hold the phone and get the light right and get me all in the shot!! But I tried, and I think that the 2 photos are useful comparisons.
When I put the dress on this weekend – I knew there had been a change going on body wise.
Katy and I are quite scales averse – for lots of good reasons – weight fluctuates, you don’t gain or lose weight in a linear pattern – and so all too often the negative feedback on the scales is counter productive and so I avoid them. However,f or the sake of some sort of scientific approach with numbers based evidence, I went on the scales this weekend, to see what they say as against what I know I feel – I can tell you I have lost half a stone – that’s 7lbs and that pretty much correlates with the ‘feel’ factor.
It hasn’t dropped off quickly, that is for sure – but that was never meant to happen anyway – so I am good with this. More than good with this.
Katy and I follow a lot of people on Instagram – and it is a brilliant and entertaining app that is for sure, but what surprised me was just how many gloriously lithe, clean eating, weight loss bunnies there were out there. People for whom, healthy eating and gym life was totally their life. Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t got any problems with this.
But for me – I wanted to have a fit and healthy life so I could enjoy doing other stuff – I didn’t want the H Plan to become my life – and I am feeling pretty bloody good right now – unbelievably so actually.
I am enjoying exploring new ways of eating, and eating things that are new to me, and a lot of what I am learning I have discovering via people such as Instagrammers who are a very sharing lot overall. I am enjoying exploring the health food shops and I am massively enjoying not feeling like this new approach is a diet in the traditional sense.
I liken it to when I decided, many years ago to become a vegetarian, or when, having being diagnosed as coeliac it became necessary to make substantial dietry changes- personal decisions or illness, altered what I ate, but they didn’t become my life – just a change to my way of eating.
When I have committed to weight loss diets in the past – its all about food I can’t have – whereas changing your outlook to your overall diet and making changes organically, means that it’s all about food you don’t eat any more and embracing those foods that you do.
I hadn’t realised the strength of the psychological message I was sending myself and that alone has made the difference between what I choose now. And of course, the weight loss, slow and measured though it is, is a happy coincidence rather than that elusive goal that made me beat myself up for being a failure when cravings I couldn’t control kicked in – at which point, my weight loss journey usually ended.
The big difference physically in those 2 photos is that whilst I knew that weight had been lost, I couldn’t exactly tell you where from – it was diffused and no one was noticing except me – but I see in these photos that my biggest bug bare – the chest – looks decidedly less inflated, and I really really like that.
The biggest difference mentally in these 2 photos is that the one on the right, shows a really happy person, who doesn’t sit there and hate the fact that she can ‘feel’ her body, straining against her clothes feeling awful, fat and loathsome – sounds over the top doesn’t it? But it’s true.
I’m not starving myself, I am not even disallowing food – in fact my body probably thinks it’s the best thing I’ve done for it in a long time – I’m not bloated, I’m not suffering any sluggishness and I feel energised. It’s really not a bad result for 2 months in – and I know that this new path is one I like – I feel like I’m re discovering me.
It’s a lovely feeling.